apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
Everytime she tries to call me all I can think about is when she tripped walking down my steps during her walk of shame. Then I laugh until it goes to voicemail
I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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