You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
Randomize
