Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
Im part way to drunk.
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
Randomize
