i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
Randomize
