look no pants
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
I party with great urgency now.
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