Sex has been so nonexistent lately that when I was masturbating the other day, I actually paused to yawn.
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
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