Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
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