I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
Randomize