I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
How the fuck did you go into work today? You are a better man than I. I couldn't even show up to being unemployed on time.
hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
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