She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
Your penis caused this!
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