i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize