Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
Randomize
