i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
Randomize
