so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
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