just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
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