it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
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