so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
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