i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
Sober me is really good at getting to the airport on time. Drunk me is really good at shitting my pants. Do you know how much pants cost at the airport????
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
Randomize
