There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
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