My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
Randomize
