so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
birth control should be required to get into college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My CPA just snapchatted me a picture of her playing beer pong at a picnic. Time to do my own taxes?
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
Randomize