Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
Sext me about skeletons
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