how do flat chested girls get laid?
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
Randomize
