Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
Randomize
