You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
Randomize
