like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.