Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
my sisters under your porch take her home
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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