dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
i just shit an entire soup salad and breadsticks from the olive garden... bud light wins again.
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
