Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
Randomize
