He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
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