talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
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