i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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