what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
Randomize
