doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
I just ate a cockroach and I want to be a fire truck.
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
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I am midnight drunk by noon
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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