That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
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Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
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Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
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