literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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