no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Randomize
