I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
Randomize
