The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
Randomize