i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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