just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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