No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Randomize
