im drinking this country out of the recession.
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
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