yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
There are leaves in my underwear?
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
Randomize
