I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
