I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
Randomize
