I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
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