Hey man sorry I got all grabby
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
I think I just shit out all my problems.
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Randomize
