I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
Randomize
