Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
