Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
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This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
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