I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Randomize
